As we stumble through life these days, I know our friends wonder how we stay sane. Its entirely due to our faith in God's provision. When my sweet husband was laid off in 2008, we wondered how we would survive. It has only been by God's hand in our lives. We have been through some pretty rough patches in the last 26 months. We will get through this and I am sure there will be more patches along the way, but through it all, good days and bad, God has been here watching over us. Blessing us with little reminders of His care of us.
One of the scriptures I lean on is Psalm 91:4 "He will cover you with His feathers and under His wings you will find refuge." Some days I literally hide there. I know its not for me to understand why our savings are dwindling away and there is no work for my very talented husband. But yet, we had the savings. God instilled in us years ago to get out of debt and put money aside when it would have been far more tempting to get a newer car or upgrade the carpet. But we didn't "need" those things and while we squirreled away money and I learned to refine my couponing skills, we were oblivious to what God was preparing us for. He prepared us for today.
When we found out that our move here was going to lead to unemployment we were very confused. We had felt that our move to this area was by God's hand. We were brought here for a purpose. But how could the purpose be unemployment? That certainly doesn't make sense in my mind. But His ways are not my ways and He prepared me for what was coming: "Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you or forsake you!" Deut 31:6. I knew, we knew that were not being left here to lose everything we had worked for. We began to cut back on spending, scrimp on luxuries and think carefully about each purchase. As we looked hopefully toward spring of 2009, we thought surely a new position would open up. But that was not His plan. Try as we might to figure it out, to fix the situation, we were set to go another winter without work. During this dark winter He gave me "Do not be afraid nor dismayed because of this great multitude, for the battle is not yours, but God's...you will not need to fight in this battle." 2 Chronicles 20:15b, 17. To me this said so clearly that all my efforts and political activity and all the phone calls and resumes were not going to make it come to pass before His timing. He is never early and He is never late as a dear friend reminds me on a regular basis. As unemployment came to an end, my deepest fear, He gave me further strength and resolve that I can do this with Him and He will provide.
We continue to live carefully and on less and less and do without what others might see as so much. And yet almost daily He reminds us that we have so much more than others and that He can provide even our smallest wishes, like box turtles and a free sack of vegetables. Mysterious checks in the mail or love offerings from other churches. Even a trip away from home with my husband or a paid hospital bill. We have learned not to question it but to receive it as a blessing from Him through others. As we wait with baited breath for the job He has for my husband, we know we are in His hands and he cares for us so deeply. So we set our eyes on Him and look eagerly for His guidance and expectantly for what He has planned.
God is so good!